1. I use my Facebook to help me keep track of people from my Mission in Russia...
- The error is that "Mission" should not be capitalized.
- I use my Facebook to help me keep track of people from my mission in Russia...
2. General Authorities have recently even started saying how important it is that we share the gospel with Social Media.
- The error is that "Social Media" should not be capitalized.
- General Authorities have recently even started saying how important it is that we share the gospel with social media.
3. notice that several in your class aren’t paying attention, and instead have the blue glow of a computer screen on their faces.
- After the word "attention" there should be a semicolon. The following line after "instead" is an independent clause.
- notice that several in your class aren't paying attention; instead, they have the blue glow of a computer screen on their faces.
4. I have a Professor, who will not let ANYONE in a class of 600 use a computer.
- The comma after "Professor" is not necessary.
- I have a Professor who will not let ANYONE in a class of 600 use a computer.
5. Why? I’m sure it’s because he has caught so many students getting distracted with tweeting or facebooking, and because they’re not paying attention they’re not doing well in the class.
- The error is the sentence structure following the comma after "facebooking." It's a jumbled phrase that doesn't sound right. It would be better if the comma was replaced with a semi-colon.
- Why? I'm sure it's because he has caught so many students getting distracted with tweeting or facebooking; as a result, students are not paying attention and are therefore not doing well in the class.
Nicely done. In number four, you would actually not capitalize "professor." The trick here is this: if you are referring to a professor by name (for example, Professor Smith) you'd capitalize it, but just saying "a professor" doesn't require caps. Good work though!
ReplyDeleteGood job on finding your mistakes. Just by reading those 5 sentences makes me want to read the rest of your paper. It sounds like an interesting topic.
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